onsdag den 3. juni 2009

communication for shy guys

What is it about shy guys and communication? Shy guys may have a little more trouble expressing themselves in an outgoing people. Sometimes they need that little extra "push" to get them talking.
On he plus side, shy guys are less likely to be loudmouthed or dominate the conversation. They are more likely to let the other person talk, too.
To talk to the shy guy, try showing interest in him. Ask him questions that can't be answered with a simple "yes" or "no." Questions such as "How do you like living here?" "How long have you lived in this area?" "What do you do for recreation?", "Do you enjoy sports?" and suchlike are excellent ways to get the conversational ball rolling.
You may have to make a little effort to balance the two-way exchange. We are all told that dominating the conversation is not a good thing, and the shy guy may feel guilty or uncomfortable if you try to push him to do all the talking. So balance your asking of questions with sharing a little about yourself as well. This will help to balance out the conversation and keep it from sounding like an interview.
You may find that talking to the shy guy is a little bit like priming the pump. You need a few cranks of a lever to get it going. The response to your question of "How do you like it here?" May bring a response of "Well, it's all right, I guess. "
So, to balance the two-way exchange, you may mention how much you enjoy living in the area, how your family all lives here, and how you like to go to the park frequently. Then you ask the shy guy another question.
By sharing a little of yourself, You show that you're willing to give as well as take, so the shy guy is more likely to be feel comfortable in sharing of himself. Your next questions are more likely to bring a good response, but you may need to repeat this process a few times in your conversation to really get things going.
Remember these things about shy guys and communication and I think you will find that shy guys can be great people to talk to.

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